Concert Review/Shopping Channel?

I have to admit, I'm jealous of bands. Which is probably why I love them so much and have resigned myself to writing about them for the rest of time.

I saw Thornley and Three Days Grace last night. Smiled and nodded to the singer of TDG while scampering backstage after their tour manager (yes Megan that's right...tour manager! :P) Liam, whom I'd heard lots about before the show but had never actually met.

Anyway, I've read up on Thornley, and have listened to their songs on their website, but I wasn't prepared, in any way, for the amount of just total and complete (to re-overuse a word I consistently overuse) talent. I think I may have a new favourite band...Plus the bassist is hot.

Three Days Grace, whom I had completely written off after they guest-apeared in that Hilary Duff movie, were actually just...amazing. I definately have a new appreciation for them. And, let me just say right now there is nothing sexier than a man smoking a cigarette while playing guitar...absolutely nothing.

Seriously though, both absolutely incredible bands, had such a good night aside from being tired from shopping.

And on a side note, I think I may be a tad insane, I spent $60.00 on a t-shirt yesterday. Yes it's vintage...yes it says "Rolling Stones" on it in studded rhinestones, and fits me pretty much perfectly. And yes, it will be my new concert t-shirt. Perhaps also with a denim mini and flipflops in the summer...and sunglasses. And yes I will keep it forever (Stacy and Clinton I don't care what you say, it's staying!) but still...$60.00...for a t-shirt. Highway robbery n'est pas?

And on an end note, I am now the proud owner of converse sneakers after looking for a pair in my size for ages. Not in a punk way, in the, "oh converse's are just such an ironic statement that I must have a pair and wear them forever..." that is when I'm not wearing my new stilletto slouchy boots that I plan to buy.

Anywho this has been long enough and the gym is calling. Ta-ta! xoxo

Christmas and the little black dress...

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope everyone's holidays are going well.

Just a little free Christmas advice from me: While wandering throughout HMV this year, wondering how to spend that little gift card your parents gave you...buy Porcupine Tree's latest album: Deadwing!...even if you can't stand them, it in itself is an outstanding album. Alas, I cannot put it on my iPod and so am reduced to sitting around my cd player like they did in the days of yor...or three years ago.

That's it for me, just a holiday wish and imparting my musical tastes upon the rest of you. Now it's off to church...what can I wear this year? Hopelessly short little black dress or perhaps hoplessly fitted black pants and heels? ah the conundrums of making a fashion statement in the house of God.

...Little black dress it is.

Ps. Does anyone else (other than Erika because we've had this chat so I know I'm not completely abnormal) suddenly have the most X-rated thoughts in church? I'm not sure why, but knowing I'm not supposed to be thinking anything suddenly makes me think about parties, drinking, sex, if Jesus ever got into any mischief, and I can't help but think he did. After all, Jesus was cute back in the day. Which isn't blasphemy, it's just a fact.

A little rant from the T dot...

Alright enough with the emo posts...

First of all, hello from Toronto. I'm having a blast, have gotten lost going to Kitchner and Toronto multiple times, though ending up in Barrie was just tons of fun! (just kidding for those of you who have ever been lost in Barrie)

Anyhow, the next few days are pretty much devoted to family, given the Season...

I miss certain things about this town. The gym, much as I love the Y, is far superior here. I just had the best workout. My bed is more comfortable, my home is homier...and though I love my friends in Calgary dearly (so Megan, Erika, Jen and whoever else reads this? ...sooo nothing against you) but there' something to be said for a friend who looks at you and knows exactly what you're thinking. Lex, if only you read this...you'd be touched by that. (ha...ha)
There's so much else, but those are the things that come to mind off the top of my head.

And now, the inevatable Mr. Big update. Who knows, a great...six hours spent together, a great talk, a great hug. A great lukewarm sentiment..."who else is lucky enough to have their very own Victoria..." and yet, may I ask, what the hell does that mean, and what am I meant to say in response other than a "*cough* I um, well you know, um, care about you a lot *coughtrynottopassoutandorsaythewrongthingcough*" only to provoke the reply "I feel like you're holding something back..." well no shit Eintstein!

I would normally assume that I'm not seeing him again on this trip, given the fact that we generally see each other once. However, my grandmother being the little matchmaking vixen that she is (she loves Mr. Big dearly, I believe she might have blushed when they spoke...) lent him five; overboard(?), movies since they are both history buffs, and demanded that he come for tea. Now, I suppose this means I will see him again on this trip?...or perhaps not. But I can wait till June.

...PS. David Forsayeth will you please for the love of God get on MSN or call me? thanks! :)xox

Tell me what I'll never be...

Alright. So...I'm back. Hello. I apologize for the lack of entries and yet at the same time, it does my fragile ego good to know people read this!

Anyway, alas, another entry about love, just because it's an inexauhstible (sp? sorry it's late).

So, basically for the most part...here it is as blunt as it will ever be. I love the quirkily beautiful boy. I'm not sure if it's the 'till death do us part' love, but it's love nonetheless. And yet, for some reason, I know I'm going to fuck it up. I've almost resigned myself to it, because I'm not sure what else to do.

I'm starting to scare myself more and more, not because I'm unhappy. For the most part, aside from typical teenage angst, I'm giddy with happiness. I love my friends, my music, I know what I want to do with my life...I'm just content with where I'm going if not excited for the future. Anyway, just to clarify...I'm not sad about anything. But, I'm so insecure about myself that it's begining to annoy even me and I can't help it. I'll look in the mirror some days and not be able to see anything good about myself, look through a closet full ofclothes and feel a deep panic that I have nothing to wear because I'm too big to be seen in public...and I'm convinced that one day Travis will look at me and wonder why he is with someone so ugly. And I know this isn't healthy, and I also know that looks aren't everything and apparently Travis wants me in spite of whatever I see...

And for some reason, I can't stop these thoughts once they start. So I suppose it's just something I'll have to get over. I just sometimes hate going out because I'm so convinced people are looking at me and wondering why he's even with me.

I hate being that girl who's this insecure...because even as I re-read this I just know I'm being ridiculous because love has nothing to do with looks so why do I care?

However, I suppose at least I'm taking chances on life/love? There's this woman who I just saw a documentary on: Jen Davis. A photographer, who is so talented it makes me sick (in my current state...this is a compliment to dear Jen Davis and should not be taken as anything but...).
But her projects also make me really sad. She takes pictures of herself in poses that she wishes were her real life. For instance there's a shot of her in bed with a man's arm around her. But she 'knows' that's not a reality for her because she's overweight. Well, all I have to say is that, fuck her...she feeds my messed up theory because I wonder if she's right...maybe I don't deserve anyone either.

On another note, Mr. Big knows about the quirky boy. There was an amused crack in his voice as though now he can tell her how much he misses her without her reading into it. I do sort of have some satisfaction in telling him that someone cares about me, and how great someone else is. It's hard to explain sometimes, but I guess suffice to say you just...never get over your first love and sometimes, life can just make you into a petty little mess.